You Don't Have To Be Alone...

‘When we have changes of perception, we can lose control of the very personality that makes us who we are.’ SAW, 2018

I believe, whether we admit it openly or not that many of us have experienced feelings of loneliness. The complexity of loneliness can be overwhelming and could lead from simply feeling, being alone and feeling a lack of connection to our inner and external worlds.

Emotional isolation is also a dynamic of loneliness, which can cause concerns relating to anxiety, depression, mental and physical debilitation, low self-worth, low confidence, and even narcissism (imposing controlling when in the presence of others), withdrawal from society.

When loneliness ‘creeps in’, it can grip, like a vice and holds you victim to self. It can affect you when in solitude and isolation, affecting your lucidity, your way of thinking can become warped, physical and mental articulation may present itself without clarity, thereby inconsistency unbalancing your very nature.

I believe that there are many causes for loneliness, including grief (which takes many forms). Grief has a way of presenting deep-rooted loneliness, which could spiral out of control if not addressed. You do not have to be alone to be lonely. Mental and emotional loneliness can be just as depressive an experience and can be evident when in a relationship, marriage or even in a group setting, etc.

The Campain to End Loneliness, * offers the following surprising facts regarding health risks:

  • Loneliness is as bad for you as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. (Holt-Lunstad, 2010)

  • Loneliness is worse for you than obesity. (Holt-Lunstad, 2010)

  • Lonely people are more likely to suffer from dementia, heart disease and depression. (Valtorta et al, 2016) (James et al, 2011) (Cacioppo et al, 2006)

  • Loneliness is likely to increase your risk of death by 29% (Holt-Lunstad, 2015)

They further advise, that a survey by Action for Children found that 43% of 17 – 25 year olds who used their service had experienced problems with loneliness, and that of this same group less than half said they felt loved.

Research by Sense has shown that up to 50% of disabled people will be lonely on any given day.

Action for Children, have also reported 24% of parents surveyed said they were always or often lonely.

So, you see, the trend continues from generation to generation! Loneliness is not only a condition for the older generation, but can start in infancy. Stimulating a child’s life conditions/processes. As they mature children may embrace different outlooks in life, therefore avoiding this trait.

We do not have to feel embarrassed for experiencing sadness, loneliness. Addressing our feelings, as we understand it and realizing a need for change may help you realign your focus of self-worth. Sometimes, we are not aware of how we feel and unable to see that loneliness has knocked our door and we have allowed it to creep on in! If you are lonely or know someone who is, we can find ways to fill short and/or long periods of loneliness, by maybe finding new interest pursuits, returning to previous interests, joining groups, exercising and/or starting ‘talking’ therapy. If you can not help yourself, seek someone that can aid you.

Convincing yourself to believe that you are okay does not mean you have worked on the concerns that have led you to feeling lonely, but you can take a step to feeling accountable for your feelings!

Loneliness is a kaleidoscopic topic and could provide each other in depth value, once shared.

Love and positive regard to self and others go a long way.

Please subscribe and feel free, to have your say. I look forward to hearing your comments.

Loneliness Research. Available: https://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/loneliness-research/. (2017). Last accessed March 2018.